cherry blossoms
lately things have been difficult, and i've been struggling to find balance. i think running away is okay sometimes, but i want to enjoy my youth while i still have it, too. before i ruin everything, you know? i want everyone to be happy. i want to make everyone happy. i want to be the one to make everyone happy. nobody else.
i still don't really understand what to do anymore, or more or less how to do it, but i'll try to keep going. i'm not even sure what my mind wants of me at this point. i'm so out of sorts that i could die at any time of the day. why does this have to be so fleeting? i suppose that's what makes it beautiful.
and to you, you'll find a place where you belong. it may take a while, but even if you lose hope you have to continue. we've both learnt that your happiness cannot be found with me or from me. i'm so sorry for that. if only you had just realized how much i love you. if you had found me hanging there you would've known for the rest of your life. if you had seen my lifeless body you would've known my love. such a shame it had to turn out this way.